Esophagus Slice Saturday: The Conductor’s Florida Derby Day Plays at Gulfstream Park

Hold on to your nuts. Let’s Ride

Race 1: 1 1/16 Mile. (Turf) Clm 16000

#5 Billy Big (5/1) – Whenever he drops to this level, he is a major contender.

Race 2: 7 Furlongs. F.Clm 6250

#1 Is That Magic (2/1) – She looks best to the Conductor, no strong opinions here.

Race 3: 1 Mile. Mdn 80k

*Gullet Shot of the Day #8 Jamaican (12/1) – Stretching out for the first time, he’s working well and showed real ability as a 2-year-old.

taylor swift GIF

Race 4: 1 Mile. G2 Gulfstream Park Mile

#6 Guy Caballero (12/1) – He has good early speed in a race without much pace. He ran very well in his 1st career start on dirt last time.

Race 5: 6 ½ Furlongs. F.Clm 12500

#7 Sonoma Storm (4/1) – The Conductor has that feeling in his left knee.

Race 6: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.Sanibel Island Stakes

#3 A Bit Special (9/5) – There is nothing to knock about this filly.

Race 7: 1 1/16 Mile. (Turf) F.Mdn 80k

#2 Niko’s Dream (9/2) – The Conductor liked this girl’s 2nd last time from the 10 post. She is steadily improving.

Race 8: 1 1/16 Mile. G2 Gulfstream Park Oaks

#5 Champagne Anyone (6/1) – He hasn’t had pace to run at in the last few.  With a hotter pace today he’ll have every chance.

Race 9: 1 1/16 Mile. (Turf) Mdn 80k

#8 Social Paranoia (3/1) – If he doesn’t win here, he never will.

Race 10: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.100K Sand Springs Stakes

#9 Proctor’s Ledge (4/1) – 2/2 at Gulfstream in her career, her late kick is thunderous.

Race 11: 7 Furlongs. OC 25000n1x

#4 Roc Doc (8/1) – This horse keeps getting better with each start.

Race 12: 1 Mile. (Turf) OC 62500n2x

#5 Black Sea (20/1) – This gelding has very strong late pace figures.  The Conductor will key him in the trifecta.

Race 13: 1½ Mile. (Turf) G2 Pan American Stakes

#2 Melmich (6/1) – 3rd off the layoff, the Conductor loved his last race, closing into a slow pace. He’s a warrior.

Race 14: 1 1/8 Mile. FlaDerby-G1 Xpressbet Florida Derby Grade I

*Never a Doubt Lock of the Day 1 Hidden Scroll (5/2) – He set a torrid pace last start and won’t have that problem today. With a better ride from Castellano the Conductor sees him putting on a show and becoming your derby favorite.

mr. t scroll GIF

Ponies, Videos

Force Feed Friday: The Conductor’s Must Win to Survive Plays at Gulfstream Park

The Conductor does not want to play the ponies today.  He wants to suck his thumb and scream at the replay of the Tennessee “foul” at the end of the game.  But, he is the Conductor.  This is the cross he bears.  He must get back on the horse not only for himself, but for his loyal passengers.  This is the life he chose.

A graze of the leg? Gross. It also took him 7 seconds to inbound the ball………Let’s Ride.

Race 1: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) MC 20000

#9 Art’s Table (8/1) – 3rd off the layoff, he showed good early speed last start and gets a rider upgrade to Louis Saez today.

Race 2: 7 Furlongs. S.OC 12500n1x

#2 Jalen Journey (8/1) – 2nd off the layoff, she crushed last start and ran a very strong number.  She’s stepping up in class but has an early pace advantage in here.

Race 3: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.Clm 16000b

#6 Salsita Roja (5/2) – 1st off the claim for strong connections, she can scoot.

Race 4: 7 Furlongs. MC 35000

#6 Big Alex (6/1) – He’s making progress in each start and adds blinkers today.

Race 5: 6 ½ Furlongs. F.Clm 12500

*Gullet Shot of the Day #8 Royally Cool (5/1) – She set a blistering pace last time out in a race that has come back very strong.  She’s the Conductor’s best bet of the day over 3/1.

face peanuts GIF

Race 6: 1 Mile. (Turf) MC 50000

#1 All in Stew Out (6/1) – Drawn well to the inside 3rd off a layoff, he showed a strong late kick last start closing into a slow pace.

Race 7: 1 Mile. Clm 30000b

#6 Drop Kick (3/1) – The Conductor liked her last race on the grass and she figures to step forward on her preferred dirt surface.

Race 8: 1 3/16 Mile. 100k Skip Away Stakes

*Never a Doubt Friday Night Bottle Service Lock of the Day #7 Rocketry (5/2) – The switch to dirt has done this man good.  Lock.

make it rain champagne GIF by MOST EXPENSIVEST

Race 9: 1 Mile. (Turf) G3 Appleton Stakes

#2 Dr. Edgar (10/1) – This gelding is in great form and this isn’t the toughest Grade 3 you’ll ever see.  The Conductor thinks he can take the step up in class.

Race 10: 1 3/8 Mile. (Turf) F.G3 Orchid Stakes

#9 Santa Monica (1/1) – Clear class of the field. Can’t Lose.

Race 11: 1 1/16 Mile. (Turf) F.MC 20000

#8 Abjure (4/1) – The Conductor doesn’t have a clue in this one.


27-1 Gullet Shot In the Finale at Turf Paradise Yesterday: The Train Rolls into Gulfstream Park for Throat Shot Thursday


Off at: 4:55   Race Type: Claiming
Age Restriction: Three Year Old and Upward
Purse: $7,000
Distance: Six And One Half Furlongs On The Dirt
Track Condition: Fast
Winning Time: 1:16.88

Pgm Horse Jockey Win Place Show
Charlie Again Kassie Guglielmino 56.80 14.60 7.40
Stax On Stacks Francisco Arrieta 2.60 2.20
Cecil the Cat Leslie Mawing 3.00

Chooooooooo!!!!!! Chooooooooo!!!!!! Go Charlie! Go! That’s how you rip a gullet out Conductor!  Now we have a little cash to play with heading into Gulfstream. Let’s Ride.

Race 1: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.MC 50000

#5 Always Lucky (6/1) – Johnny V hops aboard this well-bred 1st time starter.  The Conductor has questions about the favorites.

Race 2: 6 Furlongs. Clm 35000

#5 Leaky Cup (5/1) – Making his 1st start as a 3-year-old, this colt ran a competitive figure for this level in his maiden breaker last year.  With natural progression he’ll be more than dangerous.

Race 3: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) Clm 16000n1y

#6 City Rock (12/1) – She’s got an early pace advantage over this group.  If she can clear to the front, look out.

Race 4: 7 Furlongs. F.MC 50000

#2 Eye’s Reward (9/5) – Dropping in class to the maiden claiming level, his last two starts make him ultra-tough.

Race 5: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) S.OC 16000n1x

#4 Swagger (5/2) – The Conductor likes this guy’s attitude.

Race 6: 6 Furlongs. F.MC 20000

#3 Sky Chaser (4/1) – Dropping in class, she’s working well and Irad takes the mount for the 1st time.

Race 7: 7 Furlongs. OClm 10000

*Never a Doubt Free Golf Weekend Lock of the Day #2 Charlie the Greek (7/5) – This gelding looks like an easy winner shortening a furlong after a strong 2nd last time.

happy gilmore golf GIF

Race 8: 1 1/16 Mile. (Turf) F.Mdn 50k

#1 Live Young (20/1) – This filly didn’t show much in her debut, but she was a cool 425k at the Keeneland sale. The Conductor will give her a shot to hit the board at a monster number.

Race 9: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.OC 25000n2x

#7 Go Rose (3/1) – She looks to get a perfect trip.

Race 10: 6 Furlongs. F.OC 62500n2x

*Gullet Shot of the Day #4 Awesome Mass (8/1) – 2nd off the layoff she dueled to set a hot pace last time and she has past figures to make her competitive.  She shortens a furlong too.

Partying Jersey Shore GIF

Race 11: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.MC 16000

#10 You Cant Catch Her (20/1) – She’s dropping in class and moved early into a hot pace last start. This race is disgusting.


Wind Pipe Whack Wednesday: The Conductor’s Plays at Gulfstream Park

4/1 and 6/5 winners along with 14/1 Gullet shot of the day running 2nd made it a profitable Tuesday at the Fair Grounds. The train heads off to Gulfstream today for our regularly scheduled programming mid-week. Last Wednesday the Conductor made us some loot.  Let’s double down, Let’s Ride.

Race 1: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.MC 20000

#5 Miss Claudia (8/1) – She took money in her debut and showed good early speed in a race taken off the turf.  She’s bred to take a big step forward on the grass.

Race 2: 1 Mile. Clm 6250n2L

#4 Interlaken (3/1) – Dropping to this level last start, he ran a good 2nd behind a blowout winner closing into a slow pace.  This race doesn’t have any pace either, but there aren’t any good horses either.

Race 3: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.MC 20000

*Never a Doubt Humpday Lock #7 Lillie’s Heat (5/2) – She was nailed after setting a hot pace last start at this level. She’ll appreciate shortening to a mile.

Related image

Race 4: 6 Furlongs. MC 35000

#6 Fafa Fooey (9/5) – Chalk.

Race 5: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.Clm 16000n3L

*Gullet Shot of the Day #2 Our Closure (10/1) – She won nicely last start in the slop, closing into a slow pace.  She has strong late pace figures and the Conductor will key her in the exacta.

Image result for strangle four brothers gif

Race 6: 1 Mile. OClm 10000

#4 Quenane (5/1) – He’s plunging in class and his last race came up very fast, hung wide vs stakes company. 5/1 would get the Conductor tingly.

Race 7: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) Clm 30000n2L

#2 Shanghai Noon (5/1) – He was bumped at the start and still rallied to be beaten only 3 ½ lengths. He’ll have every chance with a clean trip.

Race 8: 1 Mile. (Turf) Clm 50000n2L

#9 Eagle Dance (8/1) – Navarro 2nd Off the claim

Race 9: 6½ Furlongs. F.OC 25000n1x

#4 Cypriana (4/1) – Dropping in class and adding blinkers, she’s got the back class to beat this field.

Race 10: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.MC 25000

#8 Cassini’s Plunge (15/1) – This filly showed good early speed and faded badly in her debut.  She adds Lasix today and this field is heinous.

Ponies, Videos

Esophagus Slice Saturday: Fountain of Youth and Graded Stakes Plays Gulfstream Park

Huge bailout in the night cap yesterday. Now we have a great Saturday of racing staring us right in the eyes including the Fountain of Youth.  Derby Preps are in full swing, full card plays at Santa Anita will be up shortly.  Let’s Ride.

Race 11: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.G3 Honey Fox Stakes

#1 Precieuse (7/2) – She’s European G1 winner and she ran huge in her lone US start,  just missing vs Uni.  Chad will win like he always does.

Race 12: 1 Mile. F.G2 Davona Dale Stakes

#1 Jaywalk (2/5) – This field can’t beat her.

Race 13: 1 1/16 Mile. G2 Fountain of Youth Stakes

*Gullet Shot of the Day #4 Bourbon War (10/1) – This colt had no chance in the Remsen, trying to close into a tepid pace.  He engulfed the field last race without getting a setup either.  There is plenty of speed in here, he should get a great trip and the Conductor will key him in the exacta ant tri.

alfred hitchcock workout GIF

Race 14: 1 3/8 Mile. (Turf) G2 Mac Diarmida Stakes

#3 Melmich (15/1) – This old man loves to hit the board and will be flying late.  With a hot pace too run at, he can spice up the tote.  Another exacta and tri key.


Flush With Cash From Parx: The Conductor Looks to Pounce on Wind Pipe Whack Wednesday at Gulfstream Park

The Conductor’s pockets are lined with cash after a great start to his racing week yesterday. 6/1 gullet shot of the day, along the lock of the day and another 5/2 runner were all victorious.  Like a lion stalking a wounded buffalo, when the Conductor smells blood, he goes in for the kill. Gulfstream is getting a steel pipe to the Adams apple today. Let’s Ride.

Neck Monk GIF

Race 1: 6 Furlongs. F.Clm 16000

#7 Roally Cool (6/1) – 1st off the claim for Navarro, she owns the fastest figures in the field and is drawn well to the outside.  She also gets a weight break today.

Race 2: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.Clm 16000

#11 Dahlonega (8/1) – Dropping in class and shortening back to her best distance, she’s very dangerous and her price will stay high with low % connections.

Race 3: 7 Furlongs. F.OClm 10000

*Never a Doubt Humpday Lock #4 Radiantrithym (9/5) – Her last race kills this group.

camel get GIF

Race 4: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.Clm 16000n2L

#2 Gran Letzia (8/1) – She’s been off for a long time but is working well for red hot connections.  She has strong early pace figures.

Race 5: 6 Furlongs. MC 16000

#5 Sky D (10/1) – Shipping in from Tampa and 1st off the claim for trainer Victor Barboza Jr., he’ll try sprinting on dirt for the first time. He has upside.

Race 6: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.Mdn 50k

#9 Nymphesa (20/1) – This filly made an early move last race then flattened out down the lane.  In her 2nd start off a layoff she’ll have more stamina and will be a big number.

Race 7: 1 1/16 Mile. OC 25000n1x

*Gullet Shot of the Day #7 Just Whistle (6/1) – Making his return to the races after a 6-month layoff, this colt showed real talent as a 3-year old.  If he comes ready, he’s your winner.

f. w. murnau blows whistle GIF by Maudit

Race 8: 1 1/16 Mile (Turf) Clm 16000n2L

#3 Simmardstrike (8/1) – None of these horses are any good and he’s dropping in class and exiting a key race.

Race 9: 6 Furlongs. Clm 12500b

#11 Mr Joshua (7/2) – Dropping in class for top connections with a pace advantage against this field, he’s a cynch.

Race 10: 1 1/16 Mile (Turf) MC 20000

#13 Sensational Zip (3/1) – He’s the one to beat


Wind Pipe Whack Wednesday: The Conductor’s Play at Gulfstream Park

Not great at Turf Paradise yesterday, but we all know Podunk tracks don’t count.  The Conductor makes his hay playing the big boy tracks, and the train rolls back into Gulfstream today.  11 race card, the Conductor is so generous to cap that much for us on a Wednesday.  Not all heroes where capes, Let’s Ride.

Race 1: 1 Mile. MC 12500

#4 Watch Your Step (8/1) – The pace was too hot for him last start, he ran a solid 2nd at this level two back and will get a good trip today up close to a slower pace.

Race 2: 7 Furlongs. OClm 50000

#1 Maximum Security (3/5) – This colt hasn’t tried yet and is 2/2.

Race 3: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.Mdn 50k

#1 Meetmeonline (7/2) – She’s set blistering paces in her last two starts and held on strongly. Cutbacks don’t work as well on grass, but the Conductor likes her anyways.

Race 4: 1 Mile. Clm 30000n2L

 *Gullet Shot of the Day #4 Positivist (8/1) – 2nd off the layoff, he’s dropping in class, working well, and stretching out to a route for the first time.  He can take them all the way around.

Related image

Race 5: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) Clm 25000

#6 Money Come (10/1) – Steadily progressing, he exploded last start on an off track.  The Conductor likes that they want to put him back to the turf.

Race 6: 1 Mile. MC 12500

#2 Tropical Tapistry (8/1) – The Conductor doesn’t have a strong opinion in her, pick your poison.

Race 7: 1 1/16 Mile. (Turf) OClm 50000

*Never a Doubt Humpday Lock #1 Collins Ave (4/1) – The Conductor has been impressed by his first two starts.  Nothing to knock and he should be the 2nd or 3rd choice in the betting.

Related image

Race 8: 1 Mile. (Turf) F.S.Mdn 43k

#1 Andrea’s Pride (10/1) – She’s run ok vs tougher open company in New York.  She is also routing for the first time.  The Conductor is all about the rail today.

Race 9: 6 Furlongs. Clm 12500n2L

#7 Dunk (4/1) – Cutting back from a route in a race full of speedsters, he’ll get a perfect trip and wont run worse than 2nd. The Conductor will key him in the exacta.

Race 10: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.S.OC 16000n1x

#9 Salt Pond (5/1) – Speed Kills.

Race 11: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) MC 20000

#5 Licorice (3/1) – This colt is dropping in class and gets back to turf where he’s run his best.


Esophagus Slice Saturday: Mandatory Pick 6 Payout Day at Gulfstream Park

The Conductor has been terrible this week, that’s a fact.  He owns it like the leader of men that he is, but he does not accept it.  We have a great opportunity to with a mandatory pick 6 payout with a 1.5 Million Dollar carryover to make everything right in the world.  This is a very tough sequence for smaller players, but the Conductor will help us passengers out.  Let’s win a lump, Let’s Ride.

Related image

PT 3:07pm ET: The Conductor’s 20cent Ticket – $126

Race 7: 2,3,4,6,11,12,15

Race 8: 2,5,9

Race 9: 3,4

Race 10: 2,3,5

Race 11: 2,3,5,8,9

Race 12: 1

*Never a Doubt 98 MPH Closer Lock of the Day #1 Cafe Americano (3/1) – You have to make a stand somewhere and if the Conductor can survive the first 5 legs, he wants his life in Chad Brown’s hands.  This well-bred, 675k filly is working well by all accounts and is drawn well to the inside.  In Chad we trust.

baseball comments GIF


Wind Pipe Whack Wednesday at Gulfstream Park: Clawing Back From the Parx Hole

Parx dug us a nice early hole to start the week, just like we wanted.  You can’t make money until your two days down, everyone knows that. Luckily for us, prices are jumping off the page for the Conductor today.  Let’s get after it, Let’s Ride.

Race 1: 1 Mile. MC 12500

#8 Proquester (8/1) – Dropping in class and trying dirt for the first time, he’s the only one with a chance to beat the odds on favorite #7 Alpha Orionis (3/5).

Race 2: 6 Furlongs. MC 50000

*Gullet Shot of the Day #2 Clipboard Money (8/1) – 1st off the layoff last start, he ran off setting a ridiculous pace and still finished 2nd going a mile.  The Conductor will key him in the exacta.

Image result for break stick with neck gif

Race 3: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.Clm 16000n2L

#8 Irish Fix (2/1) – This mare had a brutal trip last start and ran a good 2nd at this level. Drawn well to the outside, she’ll be tough.

Race 4: 1 Mile. MC 12500

#4 King Kongo (6/1) – In his first try on dirt last start he ran a good 3rd vs similar. He’s run solid early pace figures in a race without much pace.

Race 5: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) MC 50000

#3 Graysshootingstar (4/1) – 1st time gelding for top connections, working well, and was well bet in his debut.  There is nothing not to like.

Race 6: 6 Furlongs. Clm 12500b

*Never a Doubt Humpday Lock #6 Dezzer (2/1) – This colt’s recent workouts suggest his last race was a fluke.  He also has a massive pace advantage over this group.  He’ll gut them gate to wire.

camel happens GIF

Race 7: 1 1/16 Mile. (Turf) Mdn 50k

#4 Overbold (10/1) – He didn’t run a step in his debut, but he adds blinkers today and Johnny stays aboard for Mott.  He was 500k in the Keeneland sale, the Conductor will give him another shot at a big price.

Race 8: 5 Furlongs. (Turf) F.Clm 16000

#7 Ice Show (8/1) – She’s stepping up in class, but has shown versatility and has won 3 of her first 6 starts. The Irad/Vitali jockey/trainer combo are red hot, going 4-2-1 in their last 9 starts.

Race 9: 1 Mile. OC 25000n1x

#1 Botero (8/1) – This colt was very good in his maiden breaker last start and they only improve for Mott 2nd off the layoff.  He debuted for the Baffert barn, so he’s meant to be a good one.

Race 10: 1 Mile. (Turf) Clm 16000n2L

*Atom Bomb Shot of the Day #4 Rumbago (30/1) – This field is heinous besides the 3/5 favorite #10 Unlockthepotential. This colt ran 3rd at this level last start after setting a blistering pace.  If he can ration his speed better, the Conductor has seen crazier longshots, he’ll key these two in the trifecta.

nuclear explosion bomb GIF

Ponies, Videos

Esophagus Slice Saturday at Santa Anita: Mandatory Pick 6 Payout Day

Let’s Ride.

Race 1: 6½ Furlongs. S.OC 20000n1x

#1 Red Envelope (5/1)  – He’s steadily improving and the Conductor was impressed with his maiden breaking score last start.  This field is not very good.

Race 2: 6 Furlongs. Clm 32000

#2 Denman’s Call (5/2) – He loves Santa Anita and ran a strong figure with his win off a layoff last start.  He’s working well and has back class.

Race 3: 5 ½ Furlongs. F.MC 50000

#6 Calm Down Lady (8/5) – Chalk.

Race 4: 6 Furlongs. F.Alw 57000n1x

#7 Tiz Toffee (3/1) – Drawn well to the outside, she ran a good 2nd last race and is working well. She also gets a weight break.

Race 5: 7 Furlongs. Mdn 55k

#1 Polar (4/1) – Tough to draw the rail in your debut, but the birdies are chirping that this boy is the goods.  His works make it look that way too.

Race 6: 1 1/16 Mile. Robert B. Lewis Stakes

*Never a Doubt Saturday Starter Lock #5 Mucho Gusto (8/5) – This Baffert runner has a pace advantage against this group and has steadily progressed.  The Conductor loves him.

Image result for lock gif

Race 7: 5½ Furlongs. MC 30000

#5 Toby Time (5/1) – Tough to like anyone in this field.  He adds blinkers, plunges in class and is working well.

Race 8: 6½ Furlongs. Mdn 55k

*Gullet Shot of the Day #7 C Falls (20/1) – Low volume trainer Shelbe Ruiz has surprised with some 1st starters recently.  His dam is 2/2 producing winners including a stakes winner and Desormeaux takes the mount.

Image result for chop off head gif

Race 9: 1 1/8 Mile. G2 San Pasqual Stakes

#7 Mckinzie (4/5) – He put on a show in his comeback race in the Malibu.  He’s got loads of talent and the Conductor can’t see him losing.

Race 10: 5½ Furlongs. Clm 12500n2L

#4 Das Bear (8/1) – He ran a solid figure to break his maiden last start and is lightly raced.  He has potential and this race is wide open.